Stop drinking alcohol
Making the choice to quit an addiction is life changing. If you are trying to figure out how to stop drinking alcohol, using drugs, get through depression, anxiety or just want to be happier, you are in the right place. My name is Nicholas and I’m glad that our paths have crossed.
You will know deep down if you have a drinking or drug problem and so will your loved ones. No one can make you quit only you can make that decision. All I wish for you is a happy life. Maybe you aren’t happy or not entirely sure you ever have been? Perhaps you are just plain miserable, angry, afraid or lost… know that I get it. I have been down in that darkness, beyond hopeless completely broken wishing for an end to my agony.
Even with 6 years sober I have days where I struggle to find a balance. Just getting the courage to stop using alcohol and drugs felt like heartbreak and losing a part of myself all at once. When I finally made the choice to get sober I was floating on a wonderful, soft, pink cloud. I felt reborn and life was exciting for once! I actually felt a natural high and couldn’t keep a shit eating grin off my face. Not to long after my rebirth reality hit me pretty hard when I realized that I would have to maintain my “Alcoholism” for the rest of my life. For the record I’m not a huge fan of the title Alcoholic but I do use it to make daily interactions easier.
It doesn’t matter what you call yourself, just don’t take yourself too seriously. This journey can be hard enough if you let it, without us judging each other on what we call ourselves or how we stay sober. I prefer “Lifeaholic” personally because anything can be turned into an addiction. I believe this is a sickness of mind before body.
I thought I was using substances to cope with other people, but oh how wrong I was… It’s kind of funny in an ironic sad sort of way. The truth is I was scared people and of life in general. Scared of the future and the unknown. I was even scared to be sober with my own thoughts. I was terrified to live life without alcohol. Then, when I hit my bottom it left me with no one else to blame.
I couldn’t stop drinking without help and it was like the curtain was drawn and I was butt naked. I felt vulnerable and weak. My path had came to a fork and I knew that it was time to choose a new path. I chose to check myself into rehab where I met an amazing counselor who changed my life. He was 2 years sober and genuinely happy. By all accounts he should not have been happy… and yet he was. For the first time I felt like I could do this. He said, “Just don’t drink today and then tomorrow will be today.” Simple right? Yes simple, but not easy. Pretty soon days turned into weeks and weeks to months and so it went.
I have met many people along the way who have been guides on my road to a happy life and eventually I came to realize that I am my only problem. This was not an easy wake up call for me. Lets just say after my awakening life started to get a hell of a lot easier. I started paying attention to my thought processes and constantly took the time to mentally check myself when I was feeling hungry, angry, lonely or tired. Somedays I just feel off and that’s okay. Usually when I’m to the point where I feel like I’m going to snap, I could have prevented that feeling by talking with the person I was upset with. I feel better every time I tell someone I’m getting frustrated with them. It lets that feeling out so I don’t have to try and bottle up my emotions, which is a major mind f&#$ and never solves anything.
Lets face it, most people don’t understand the torment of addiction or that hopeless end of the world feeling of trying to stop using a substance and not being able to. The average person I meet believes that alcoholics and addicts just lack willpower or have some form of ethical flaw. This is frustrating, but I have learned that the only thing I can change is myself. Like Bruce Lee says “Be like water”. Flow with life’s difficulties and don’t force things, one of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn was being okay with how life is not how I want it to be.
Get comfortable with being uncomfortable! I chose to start my journey with rehab and I’m glad I did. It was very helpful to be around others like myself and to get some direction. I also attend 12 step meetings on occasion to help keep me connected to like minded people. I’m not a 12 step stickler, however I do enjoy the camaraderie after all who understands addiction better than alcoholics and addicts?
No one can tell you to stop drinking or which path to take, nor does anyone have the right to. You find your own path and do what’s right for you. I wish you luck and strength through your journey. Hopefully this space will inspire you, give you courage and most importantly spread hope. Hope that you too can have a happy sober life beyond your wildest imagination.
Bridge the divide, don’t be afraid to be Yourself.
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